Learning that an aging parent or other loved one has received a dementia diagnosis can feel overwhelming. The entire family may feel scared, angry, stressed, and unsure of what to do next. These emotions are all completely normal reactions to a life-changing diagnosis.
Dementia means that life will change. But the following tips can make taking care of a parent with dementia just a bit more manageable.
1. Talk to a Professional
Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider before making changes to a loved one’s care plan, diet, or activity level. Dementia affects individuals differently, and care strategies should be tailored to the person’s specific needs and abilities.
2. Learn More About Dementia
Understanding dementia and how it impacts someone’s ability to perform everyday tasks and navigate life is crucial for providing quality care and support.
Let’s start at the beginning: just what is dementia?
Dementia is an umbrella term that refers to progressive conditions affecting memory, thinking, and behavior. It causes stress and anxiety for both the person with dementia and their family members. The most common type of dementia is Alzheimer’s disease, accounting for roughly 60% to 80% of all dementia cases. Other common forms of dementia include vascular dementia, Lewy body dementia, and frontotemporal dementia.
Signs of Dementia
Dementia symptoms can vary based on the exact type of dementia someone has, although common overlapping symptoms include:
- Memory loss and confusion
- Language and communication difficulties
- Spatial awareness difficulties
- Balance problems
- Behavioral changes
Recognizing the signs and symptoms of dementia can help families seek early diagnosis, find better treatment options, and develop a care plan that evolves as the person’s dementia progresses.
Stages of Dementia
Many people commonly divide dementia into three stages: early, middle, and late. As the disease progresses, someone’s ability to perform activities of daily living (ADLs) and instrumental activities of daily living (IADLs) decreases. ADLs include bathing, dressing, and grooming. IADLs include managing finances and preparing meals.
Stages of Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia can look like the following:
- Early stage dementia: Someone in the early stages of dementia may be able to live at home with modifications, but they will begin to struggle with IADLs and issues like incontinence and sleep disturbances.
- Middle stage dementia: As dementia progresses to the middle stages, someone will struggle more and more with IADLs and ADLs. The individual may get lost in new and familiar locations, forget people they know, and show symptoms of sundowning. People at this stage will need extra assistance in their day-to-day lives, and it may be a good option to start considering a move to a long-term care community.
- Late stage dementia: The end stages are marked by complete or nearly complete inability to perform IADLs and ADLs. People living with severe dementia will need full-time dementia caregivers to attend to their needs.
3. Modify Daily Tasks
After learning more about dementia, you can begin to help modify daily tasks to help your loved one navigate life safely while still encouraging independence. Everyday tasks like bathing, dressing, and eating can become challenging for people with dementia. It’s important to be patient and understanding during this time.
Ways to encourage independence in a loved one with memory loss include:
- Establishing a daily routine to reduce confusion and agitation while helping the older person feel more in control of their situation.
- Encouraging independence to help the person with dementia maintain their sense of dignity and self-worth. That may mean being patient while letting them take extra time to complete tasks like folding laundry or helping them buy items they may need, like grab bars for the bathroom or incontinence pads.
- Setting up autopay for bills, if possible, to reduce the stress of potentially missed bills and other financial anxieties.
- Installing malware and virus protection software on a loved one‘s devices to help protect them from scams.
- Encouraging downsizing to reduce stress-inducing clutter and potential fall-causing obstacles in walkways, as well as to make cleaning and maintenance work easier to manage.
4. Encourage Physical Activity
Staying active is important for everyone, including people living with memory loss. It may support overall well-being and potentially help slow disease progression, keep them socially engaged, and give them a sense of self-worth and dignity.
Discuss appropriate activity with their healthcare provider, which can include:
- Gardening
- Walking
- Dancing
- Yoga
5. Adjust Communication Styles
Communicating with a person with dementia requires patience, empathy, and understanding. It also means being able to adjust how you communicate with your loved one to meet their current ability levels and reduce conflict (or at least prevent a stressful situation from worsening).
Ways to communicate with a parent living with dementia include:
- Using simple language. Use clear language, avoid arguing, and focus on the person’s feelings.
- Validating their emotions. Validate the person’s experiences and emotions to build trust and reduce anxiety. Take into account that they can be feeling anxious and in pain, and remember to be understanding of their concerns.
- Looking for nonverbal cues. Be aware of nonverbal cues, such as body language and tone of voice, to better understand their needs and feelings.
- Using visual aids. Use visual aids like pictures or hand gestures to improve their ability to understand and engage with their environment.
- Not contradicting what they say. Do not contradict the individual. They may be particularly sensitive to what they perceive as confrontations; it can cause stress that leads to emotional outbursts. Instead, validate their emotions and switch the topic of discussion.
- Entering their reality. Your parent may believe their own long-deceased parents or grandparents are still alive. Instead of contradicting them, enter that reality and speak as if these people are still alive.
- Accepting repeat questions. Someone with dementia can have difficulty remembering things, causing them to ask the same question again and again. Do not point this repetition out. Instead, accept the questions with grace. It will lead to better outcomes for both you and your parent.
6. Prioritize Social Engagement
Social interaction is important for everyone, but especially for people with dementia. According to Alzheimer’s Society, research suggests that social isolation can increase the risk of dementia developing and worsening. That means encouraging social interaction can be an important component of dementia care.
Strategies to support social engagement include:
- Hiring companion care or elderly sitting services
- Taking the parent to church, bridge night with friends, or other regular social events
- Calling or face-timing on a daily basis
- Playing brain games or solving puzzles together
7. Don’t Neglect Nutrition & Hydration
Proper nutrition and hydration are essential for quality of life for people with dementia. Caregivers and family members should encourage healthy eating habits and provide plenty of fluids to help the aging parent maintain a healthy weight, feel better, and reduce the risk of issues like UTIs.
Specific tips to discuss with a healthcare provider for helping someone with dementia eat and stay hydrated include:
- Knowing safety concerns. People with dementia may face eating challenges like difficulty swallowing or chewing. It’s important to adapt meals accordingly to reduce the risks of choking and malnutrition.
- Adapting meals. Adaptive utensils as well as finger foods can make mealtimes less stressful by making it easier and more enjoyable to eat.
- Not forgetting snacks and drinks. Regular snacks and drinks can help maintain energy levels and prevent dehydration.
- Monitoring weight. Families and caregivers may wish to monitor the person with dementia‘s weight. Weight loss can indicate malnutrition and inadequate caloric intake, indicating that it is time to adjust meals or even visit the doctor to rule out underlying health issues. Weight gain, on the other hand, may mean it’s time to cut down on the number of calorie-dense snacks.
8. Find Support
Caregivers should not feel guilty about seeking support, taking regular breaks, or practicing self-care. It’s not a luxury. It is essential for providing quality care and maintaining personal well-being, which can help avoid burnout and improve everyone’s overall quality of life.
Services for Dementia Caregivers
Services that dementia caregivers may find useful include:
- Consider reputable local services like adult day care, elderly sitting, or respite care services. Respite care and adult day programs may offer temporary relief for families.
- Support groups. Support groups, either in-person or online, can provide emotional and mental health support as well as connect caregivers with others who are facing similar challenges, which can help reduce feelings of isolation.
- In-home care. In-home care options can include home health aides to assist with tasks like medication management or homemakers to assist with chores like laundry and sweeping.
Resources for Families
Resources that can help connect families with online and in-person local resources include:
- Alzheimer’s Association 24/7 support line (800-272-3900)
- Eldercare Locator
- Family Caregiver Alliance
- National Institute on Aging
9. Explore Long-term Care Options
In the early and even middle stages of dementia, it may be possible to help an aging parent age in place. When their care needs become too much to handle safely at home, though, it’s time to consider if long-term care communities could provide the level of care your loved one needs.
Senior living community options for people living with dementia include:
- Assisted living
- Memory care
- Skilled nursing care
Assisted Living Community
Also called:
- Assisted living facility
- ALF
Assisted living communities are perfect for people living with mild or moderate dementia. Compassionate staff members will help residents accomplish ADLs while encouraging autonomy wherever it is safe to do so, helping people with dementia feel secure, supported, and confident.
Memory Care Community
Also called:
- Dementia care community
Memory care communities are specially designed for people living with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia. Staff members ensure residents have their physical needs attended to while offering opportunities for social engagement. Community campuses are specially designed to have simple layouts to make for a less-confusing, more inviting physical environment.
Skilled Nursing Care Community
Also called:
- Nursing home
- Skilled nursing community
- Skilled nursing care facility
- Skilled nursing facility
- SNF
Skilled nursing care communities offer a higher level of care than assisted living or memory care communities. They offer 24/7 caregiving and healthcare support to people with advanced care needs.
Get Help
Dementia affects everyone, not just the person living with it. Taking care of a parent with dementia can seem overwhelming. You and other family members don’t have to face this situation alone, though. Plenty of resources exist that can connect you with the resources you need to help your aging parent live a good life while allowing you to take care of yourself as well.
If you want to explore senior living options that you think may benefit your family, contact Avista Senior Living today. One of our compassionate representatives can help walk you through your options and set up a tour at a nearby community, so you can see the Avista difference for yourself.
Disclaimer: Each person’s situation is unique. This article is for general informational purposes only and is not intended to take the place of medical, financial, tax or legal advice.
Wendy Gores, RN