“Dementia” refers to various progressive conditions that affect a person’s ability to remember and understand everyday facts, navigate daily life, and perform basic tasks. Communicating and presenting rational ideas becomes steadily more difficult as the disease progresses. These obstacles make talking to a loved one with Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia challenging. Learning more about effective communication strategies for how to talk to someone with dementia can lead to more rewarding, less stressful conversations for everyone involved.
Challenges Communicating While Living with Dementia
Communication skills decline as dementia progresses, with declines in problem-solving skills, physical challenges, memory loss, and other symptoms of dementia making it difficult to hold a conversation.
Specific conversational challenges people living with dementia may face include:
- Difficulty finding the right words
- Repetition, such as asking the same questions over and over again
- Difficulty hearing conversational partners
- Difficulty seeing conversational partners and picking up on nonverbal cues like facial expressions
- Fragmented or illogical speech
- Loss of complex vocabulary
- Difficulty understanding complex sentences
How to Speak to Someone Living with Dementia
Learning how to talk to a loved one with dementia can be difficult, but it isn’t impossible. By adjusting how you interact with your loved one, you can create a more inviting environment that makes less-stressful conversations and everyday interactions possible.
Specific ways to improve communications with people living with dementia include the following.
1. Noticing non-verbal communication
As someone moves through the stages of dementia, they may be more likely to rely less on verbal language and more on visual cues and nonverbal signals. Direct eye contact, speaking to someone at eye level, noting facial expressions, and taking stock of other body language cues (like crossed arms) can all help you understand your loved one‘s mood and context for the conversation.
2. Practicing active listening
Active listening is a specific communication technique that focuses on giving conversational partners your undivided attention; it can become a key tool in your dementia communication toolkit.
Components of active listening include:
- Giving your conversational partner your complete attention (e.g., not scrolling on a phone or having TV in the background),
- Asking clarifying questions,
- Rephrasing what the other person has said to show that you were listening and are understanding what is being said,
- Paying attention to nonverbal cues, and
- Practicing empathy.
3. Using short sentences
Someone’s ability to grasp complex sentences and advanced vocabulary may decline with dementia; the same may be true of your family member. Using short, simple sentences can make it easier for your loved one to follow your train of thought.
4. Bringing a photo album
Using visuals is a tried-and-true method for communicating with people with Alzheimer’s disease or another type of dementia. A photo album can both help a person with dementia communicate nonverbally (i.e., pointing at photos) as well as serve as a distraction if the individual becomes distressed.
5. Avoiding open-ended questions
Too many choices can overwhelm a relative with dementia. Ask simple yes-or-no questions or only give two options.
For example:
- Don’t ask: What do you want for breakfast?
- Do ask: Do you want eggs or French toast?
6. Using the right tone of voice
Dementia may make it difficult to understand words, but it will not make someone incapable of understanding tone. Emotions can run high when communicating with your relative, but be sure to use a calm tone of voice. Raising your voice or speaking in an angry or frustrated manner can confuse or stress them out.
7. Giving the person enough time
Patience is key to talking to someone with dementia. Give your loved one plenty of time to think about what you’ve said and deliver a response.
8. Creating a supportive environment
It’s hard to carry on a conversation with grace if we feel scared, anxious, or frustrated. These emotions are all common in people with dementia. To help ease conversations (and day-to-day life), create a supportive environment that helps the person with dementia feel loved, trusted, and validated.
9. Getting hearing aids or visual aids for the person
Help your loved one communicate more effectively. You can do so by getting them hearing aids, so they can better understand your words, and visual aids like glasses, so they can pick up on nonverbal conversational cues.
10. Initiating conversations
People with dementia, especially in the early stages, can be well aware that their conversational skills are dwindling; they may socially withdraw or be nervous starting conversations due to embarrassment. In these cases, simply initiate the conversation yourself, keeping other effective communication techniques in mind.
Communicating with Dementia Patients FAQs
What are three things not to say to someone with dementia?
Things not to say to someone with dementia include:
- “You’re wrong.” This statement directly contradicts the person. Never do that. Instead, validate their emotions and switch topics.
- “Do you remember…?” These types of open-ended questions about the past can cause confusion and frustration, so it’s best to stick to simple questions and avoid directly asking the person if they remember something.
- “Why are you being difficult?” Dementia can be incredibly overwhelming; someone living with Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia is not deliberately trying to be difficult or stubborn. They are likely frustrated by their new reality and may experience certain brain changes that alter their personality in ways they cannot control. Avoid judgmental statements like this one and instead practice empathy and understanding.
How do you help a person with dementia?
Some of the best ways to help an individual living with dementia include:
- Being patient and understanding
- Learning more about the types of dementia and dementia care options
- Practicing effective communication strategies like active listening
What are 6 communication techniques you should use when communicating with a person with dementia?
Six communication techniques that may help you talk to someone with dementia include:
- Avoiding open-ended questions
- Using short sentences
- Being patient
- Not contradicting the person
- Using visual cues
- Speaking in the right tone
Are these symptoms of dementia or mental health issues?
Memory loss, a decline in problem-solving capabilities, and confusion are all common symptoms of both dementia and various mental health conditions like anxiety and depression.
If you suspect a relative or friend of experiencing either mental health issues or dementia, help them schedule an appointment with a healthcare provider to get a formal evaluation.
How does Alzheimer’s change communication?
Memory impairment and other symptoms of dementia can make communication challenging… but not impossible. By learning more about how to talk to someone with dementia, you can make your loved one feel less alone while they experience what is often an isolating condition, helping to make the most out of the conversations you have with each other.
Disclaimer: Each person’s situation is unique. This article is for general informational purposes only and is not intended to take the place of medical, financial, tax or legal advice.